Having a child with a special need is a journey of pure love and the will to do whatever it takes and a constant succession of miniature decisions, unseen or unnoticed. Although the world outside may appreciate the power it requires, much of the logistical and emotional work that keeps one going on a day-to-day basis is invisible and is borne by the caretakers.
<img src=https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/d/1Uehs82h9qEHfbK0LLwe1MY05KjwW3WSJ=s0?authuser=0>What Remains Unseen Still Carries Weight?
Every success has been supported by tiers of behind-the-scenes work–organization of care teams, late-night scholarly research, emotional strength, and relentless advocacy. Parents have to learn the language of special education, fit in medical visits or therapy, and adjust practices that must be both structured and adaptable. When either the child is in school or undergoing therapy, the struggle is not suspended. Caregivers may be on the phone with insurers, scads of support programs, or preparing to meet the next obstacle. Very often, personal priorities are put aside by the constant demands of care.
Behind the scenes, there are pieces we never see: soothing a child after a sensory-overloaded meltdown, somehow negotiating last-minute schedule changes, or creating new ways to make life possible. This can be a series of experiences that may not be recognized on a school report or by a doctor, but still form a significant part of the child’s world. There is an emotional aspect as well. Stressful thoughts about the future, isolation, or attempting to fit self-imposed demands often place an invisible burden as well. What they once dreamed of can be mourned as caregivers applaud the distinct successes that now characterize and accompany their family. This may be emotionally exhausting despite all the joys and proud moments.
Support Over Solutions
Caregivers do not always need advice; they usually need understanding. A friend to offer an understanding ear, a professional to understand or a coach to get order back to life, which brings relief. Although no external assistance can solve the difficulties, it can help to carry them with greater ease. Finding others can be very reassuring, especially in local communities or internet forums.
It is especially helpful to share experiences with people who could understand what they went through. It is equally important for parents to allow themselves to take a break. Relaxing is not quitting. In reality, those pauses tend to result in rejuvenation and ultimate presence. When caregivers are taken care of, positive ripple effects are generated throughout the whole house.
Recognizing the Unseen Effort
The dedication shown to co-parenting of children with special needs often happens quietly and without recognition, but it is extraordinary. Greater awareness and compassion can help ease the journey, giving families the validation and support they deserve.
To explore the daily realities of caregiving in more depth, take a moment to view the accompanying visual guide from Coastal ABA, a provider of ABA training for parents online.
