All children do get angry sometimes, and that’s O.K. It is normal to feel angry, just as it is normal to feel happy or sad. But if kids don’t know how to manage it, they might yell or hit or say mean things.
It can damage relationships at home, at school or with friends. That’s why it is so important for parents to help their kids learn how to calm down, talk about what they are feeling and chose a better way to react.
Teaching little ones to control their anger can make kids feel better, do well in school and get along with one another as they grow up.
Why Teaching Anger Management at Home Matters?
Children learn a great deal from watching their parents. If you stay cool when you’re angry, your child will too.
Kids do what we do, so modeling healthy ways to deal with big emotions is a powerful example.
Children who know how to take care of their anger have more friends, feel more confident and know how to solve problems better.
It also helps to prevent bigger problems, such as school trouble, bullying or emotional problems later on.
Why Teaching Anger Management at Home Matters?
Kids learn a lot by watching their parents. If you stay calm when you’re upset, your child will learn to do the same.
Children often copy the behaviour they see, so showing them how to handle big emotions in healthy ways sets a strong example.
When kids know how to deal with anger, they have more friends, feel more confident, and are better at solving problems.
Teaching these skills early also helps prevent bigger problems like school trouble, bullying, or emotional struggles in the future.
How to Know If Your Child Needs Help With Anger?
It’s normal for kids to have tantrums or mood swings sometimes. But some signs your child may need extra help include:
- Yelling or screaming often.
- Hitting, throwing things, or hurting others when upset.
- Staying angry for a long time or having trouble calming down.
- Getting in trouble at school or with friends because of angry behavior.
Younger kids may cry, kick, or shout. Teens may slam doors, shut down, or say hurtful things. If your child seems angry most of the time, avoids talking, or their anger causes problems at home or school, it may be time to get help from a counsellor or enroll in a youth anger management class.
7 Simple Anger Management Techniques to Teach Your Child
Name the Feeling
And the first step is to help your child know what they feel. Teach them to express, “I’m angry” or “I’m mad.” Use tools, such as emotion charts, books about feelings or games, to teach them different feelings. When children are able to identify their emotions, they can manage them better.
Take a Break
“Tell your child that if they’re upset, it’s okay for them to have times in the day when they take space,” she said. Train them to turn away and to take their own time out. Prepare a “calm-down corner” with plush toys, books, and music or coloring supplies. You can also include calming cards with prompts to “Breathe slow” and “Take a break and try again.” Here, kids learn how to reset their own emotions.
Take Deep Breaths
When we get angry, our hearts beat faster and our breathing gets quicker. Breathing slowly helps us feel calm. Teach simple breathing tricks:
- Smell the flower, blow out the candle.
- Box breathing: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4.
- Use apps or videos made for kids that show how to breathe calmly.
Use Words, Not Actions
A lot of kids act out because they have no idea of communicating how they feel. Encourage them to express themselves with “I feel” statements, such as “I feel angry because I couldn’t have a turn.” Role-play and praise them when they do use their words. Advocate for respectful talk, even when they are angry.
Write or Draw Feelings
Provide your child with a journal or sketch pad to write or draw their feelings. It’s a private, safe way to let the big feelings out. Younger children can draw frowning faces or write a story. Older kids and teenagers might enjoy going a step further and writing down what made them upset and how they responded.
Move Your Body
Anger creates energy. Help your child release it in healthy ways:
- Jumping jacks, dancing, running, or yoga.
- Squeezing a stress ball or punching a pillow.
- Going for a walk or bike ride. Physical activity helps reduce stress and clears the mind.
Talk Every Day
Establish a schedule to touch base with your child every day. Ask, “What put the biggest smile on your face today? What made you mad?” Turn bed time, car time or dinner time into safe times to chat. Explain to your child that it’s normal to have big feelings and that you’re available to listen and assist.
Mistakes to Avoid
- Don’t say “Stop crying” or “You’re overreacting.“
- Don’t yell back. This teaches them that yelling is okay.
- Don’t punish the feeling—instead, guide the behavior.
- Avoid ignoring their anger. Validate their feelings and help them choose better actions.
When to Get Help
Sometimes kids need more support than you can give at home. If your child is:
- Hurting themselves or others
- Acting out in school or becoming very withdrawn
Constantly angry and hard to talk to, it may be time to talk to your doctor, school counsellor, or child therapist. Anger management classes or family therapy can teach your child (and you) how to handle tough emotions in healthier ways. Consider exploring programs like Mastering Anger, which offer structured lessons for parents and children to build better emotional skills together.
Conclusion
Teaching your child how to handle anger is one of the most important lessons you can give. It takes time and patience, but small steps make a big difference. Use everyday moments to talk about feelings, practice calming strategies, and model good behavior. With your help, your child can grow up feeling strong, calm, and ready to face challenges in a healthy way.
